In the small Southern town where I grew up in the 50's, it was customary for women to put on a “tea.” These teas were to honor one of the young women in the town who was soon to be married. 

A group of three women who were best friends entertained together:  Miss Virginia, Miss Sara, and Allene, my mother. 

They would plan in advance…sometimes on the phone, occasionally in person. The parties were elaborate. 

My mother and her friends were not sophisticated or wealthy.

But they knew how to put on a “tea”. The silver platters were polished and ready beforehand, along with the silver coffee pots, sterling silverware, bone china, and freshly starched linen napkins. Fresh flowers from their own yards and tasty morsels were always featured.  

My younger sister and I were designated servers. I’m guessing I was 9 when I became a part of the tea party scene. What I remember is that we had detailed instructions as we learned...

I’ve decided to come clean and tell you the truth:  I’m going to write you every week. Whoa. I cringe because I’ve said this before. But this time I really mean it.

When have you promised yourself (or someone else) that you’d do something? And then - it happens. You stop doing something you meant to do. And usually it goes like this: you miss a week. A week turns into 2 weeks and then 2 becomes a month, and then the next thing, it’s not happening.  AT ALL. Please tell me you’ve done this, too.

The thing is, I KNOW what happens for me. It’s called a big fat, mean saboteur, who sits on my shoulder.

I hear him breathing in disgust, reading what I’ve just written. “So, Jo ... when did you get so bold that you're telling people you’re going to write them every week? Really?” (I can imagine him rolling his eyes). “How long will it last THIS TIME? You can’t even think of what to write about."...

This is me on my 5th birthday right next to my sister

Today I am 69 years old.

I decided that part of my birthday present to myself would be in looking back when I was 5 years old to see if I have any of the traits she had after all these years. 

I wanted to get to know this younger part of myself since I have three granddaughters about this same age.

It's so important for me to be aware and guide them so that they don’t fall into the same traps as I did.

 This is me at 5.  I look determined and a bit defiant.

It is shocking for me now to see this photo since I grew up with a mother who didn’t tolerate any challenges to her authority and certainly not any sassiness in a little child or anyone for that matter.  

When I look into the eyes of this young girl I wonder, was I really a little spunky? 

So what was going on here?

Was there a moment of posing for the camera with my real true little self before anyone noticed and could...